Jokes

I’m periodically going to post little jokes I find in my inbox :)
Just trying to figure out how I want to structure it.. And how I can do it using WordPress :(… It’s not that easy!

1. Things Men Learn by Watching Porn!
2. How to get Laid in Japan!

Useful Japanese sentences:
Poketto-ni futon-ga hait-teru
I have a futon in my pocket.

Lub-hoteru-EEK-U-ZO!!!!
Onwards to the Love Hotel!

Kimi-te honto-ni kirei-dane
You’re really pretty.

Mae-ni atta-koto aru?
Don’t I know you from somewhere?

Ichiman-en kashite-kureru?
Can I borrow 10,000 yen?

Kino-watakusan nomisugita-ne?
You drank too much last night didn’t you?

Nampa-shita!
I scored (when playing a girl for sex)

Kimi-no-koto igai-wa kangaerarenai
I can’t live without your love.

Koko-ja hito-ni miechau-yo
People can see us here.

Bakku shito-ni suwaro
Let’s get in the back seat.

Ima Shiyo
Let’s do it now.

Kimi-to netai
I wan’t to make love to you.

Nani iro-no shitagi-o tsuketeru-no?
What color is your underwear? (If she replies “brown”, leave immediately!)

Hinin-suru-no wasurechatta
I forgot to use protection.

Shikkusu-nain suki
Let’s do the sixty-nine.

Bakku-de shiyo
Let’s do it doggy style.

Shinken-ni naritakunai.
I don’t want to get serious.

Kimi-to-dewa shigeki-teki-ja nain-da
You don’t excite me anymore.

Kimi-wa beddo-de yokunai.
You aren’t any good in bed.

Dare-ga onara-shita?
Who blew a fart?

Itsu kekkon-shitai?
When do you want to get married?

Suitaru-ga ii-na
You have a nice figure.

Shitagi-o totte
Take your underwear off.

Boko-no me-o mite
Look into my eyes.

Boku-ga hoshii-nowa kimi-dake
Your the only one I want.

Shinu-hodo aishiteru
I love you so much i could die.

Doko-no kurejitto kado-ga tsukaemasu-ka?
Which credit cards do you accept?

6 Responses to “Jokes”
  1. ka-tesu says:

    “Who blew a fart?
    Itsu kekkon-shitai?

    Take your underwear off.
    Boko-no me-o mite”

    I wish I wish I could be there when someone uses those lines! =p

  2. Redlight says:

    A man walks into a cowboy saloon bar and makes a challenge towards the barman…
    “I bet I can drink the spittoon dry.”
    “I’ll bet you $100 you can’t” agrees the barman.
    The man lifts the spittoon to his lips and proceeds to drink all of the spit in it.
    “OK you win the bet… stop… here’s your $100 dollars” says the barman looking quite green. But the man continues to drink from the spittoon.
    “Didn’t you here me, I said stop and collect your $100 dollars” argues the barman.
    The man continues to drink from the spittoon.
    “You’re sick” says the barman. Just then the man stops drinking from the spittoon.
    “Why didn’t you stop?” queries the barman.
    “I couldn’t… it was all in one lump” says the man.

  3. mitcHell says:

    A man walks into a bar.

    “Thunk”

  4. yae says:

    oh yea thats cooooooool

  5. Eiji says:

    Is it really translation? いつ結婚したい? mean when you want to marry? Not about farting. 僕の目を見て mean look to my eye. Not take off underwear. You are really Japanese women? Or old man?@ ka-tesu:

  6.  
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